HONORING THE TRANSITION FROM CHILD TO YOUNG ADULT
A few years ago, I was invited by a coworker to her
daughter's QuinceaƱera. It has its cultural roots in Mesoamerica and is
widely celebrated today throughout the Americas. Traditionally, it is a gift
from the father to his daughter on her fifteenth birthday. As I was driving
over to the event, I was thinking about how important it is for a teenage girl
to be honored. And to be respected by her father first, but also by her mother,
her family, and other adults, can be paramount to a young girl’s future.
Teenage girls are fragile. What happens to a teen girl has a lasting effect. Her
relationships with men in the future will show reflections of how her
relationships went with her father, brothers, and other men in her teenage
life.
Boys go through changes when they become young men, and I
believe they should be honored and recognized, too.
I believe that events (big or small) that bring families
together to take special notice and give honor to a child transitioning to
adulthood can be instrumental in giving teens courage, confidence, and
assurance of a good future, with the support of adults who have gone before.
I believe that there should be mention of God and the
Lord Jesus as the sovereign guide of their future, and the Bible principles as their
ultimate standard for every decision.
“In Luke 2, the Bible gives us a short synopsis of
Jesus’s transition. He had to go from being a child, a teen, and an adult, just
like the rest of us.
“Now his parents went to Jerusalem every year at the
feast of the Passover. And when he was twelve years old, they went up to
Jerusalem after the custom of the feast” (Luke 2:41-42).
At this feast, the Hebrews celebrated the great Exodus
from Egypt, and how, when the angel of death slew the firstborn of all the
Egyptians, he “passed over” the children of the Israelites.
“And when they [Joseph and Mary] had fulfilled the days,
as they returned, the child Jesus tarried behind in Jerusalem; and Joseph and
his mother knew not of it. But they, supposing him to have been in the company,
went a day's journey; and they sought him among their kinsfolk and acquaintances.
“And when they found him not, they turned back again to
Jerusalem, seeking him. And it came to pass, that after three days they found
him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and
asking them questions” (Luke 2:43-46).
Just like any teenager, Jesus found something that
fascinated him and distracted his attention away from his parents. He must have
thought it was much more interesting to hang out with the teachers than to stay
with his parents.
“And all that heard him were astonished at his
understanding and answers” (Luke 2: 47). Here we see that the Jewish
rabbis honored him. And isn’t that just the case sometimes? The parents can’t
see how amazing their kids are, but other adults see and go on and on,
lavishing the kids with praise.
“And when they [the parents] saw him, they were amazed:
and his mother said unto him, ‘Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold,
thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing.’
“And he said unto them, ‘How is it that ye sought me?
Wist ye not that I must be about my Father's business?’ And they
understood not the saying which he spake unto them” (Luke 2:48-50).
“And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and
was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.”
Here we see that Jesus, as a teenager, was generally obedient to his parents,
and that’s a great teaching lesson for teenagers. The other thing is that Mary
thought about what was now happening in this transitional phase in her son’s
life. She was taking time to really look at her son, not just as a child, but
as he was turning into an adult.
We see in the next verse that Jesus truly was becoming a
man. I don’t know if, in the Bible, any formal celebrations took place
surrounding the time of transition. Jewish Bar Mitzvahs started in
thirteenth-century France. What we know is that the Bible says that shortly
after the incident in Jerusalem when Jesus was twelve years old, he was honored
by God and by men.
“And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour
with God and man” (Luke 2:41-52)
Parents, if you haven’t already done it, how about
considering some kind of special event, even if small, to give your
transitioning child some special honor, recognition, and assurance of support
for whatever he or she may desire for the future. Every teen deserves the
stability of not only an adult’s love but maybe even more, their respect and
honor.
Love, Carolyn
More insight into how to connect our lives with the
truths of the Bible:
